Mom's weekend away!!!

So after 3yrs, 3 months, and 2 weeks of being a mom....I finally took the plunge and had my firstweekend away from Isabel!! Alittle late, wouldn't cha' say?? My high school buddy Michelle Erickson was getting married in the cities. And since we already had a plans to go to the cities in March, we decided it would be better if I just took a quick trip to the cities by myself. After a bit of planning, I ended up heading to the cities with the Hammarback family.

The night before we left, I was feeling really sad about leaving. I laid in the bed with Isabel and talked to her about mommy leaving for the weekend. Isabel just kept telling me "no mom, you don't need to go, you stay with me". My heart was breaking and I could feel the tears. I finally told Isabel, "I'll be right back, I need to go get something to drink". I ran out of the room and into the living room and stood in front of Jason. Poor Jason had no clue what was about to happen....he looked up at me and said, "oh, whats that look for?" I shook my head and started crying, and not just a few tears, I'm talking BAWLING, like that really ugly cry. You know the one thats starts and can't stop. Jason just held me and kept saying, "its okay...you'll be fine...you need to go..its good for you". But after a few minutes of me crying and begging (literally I was begging) Jason not to make me go (by the way, he wasn't making me go, but by this time I felt like everyone was making me go), Jason started to say, "okay, just stay...you don't need to go...just stay home with us". Thank goodness Jason said that, because it made me stop crying and realize, I DID NEED to go. But also it helped that I got all my tears out before I left town, so I could just enjoy my weekend.....or so I thought!!

We got to town Friday evening and right away I left with Erin and Bryan for dinner. I had a blast...I love spending time with them two (they are two of my favorite people). We had great conversation, good food, and way too many drinks!! Saturday morning I was finally able to call Jason and check in. Isabel was still sleeping when I called (which relieved me, I wasn't sure if I could handle hearing her voice just yet). While we talked Jason informed me that Isabel had a tough time on Friday night without me. Apparently she was walking around the apartment asking for me and carrying pictures of me saying "this is my mommy"! Wow, talking about breaking my heart. Jason also said she asked "when's mommy coming home" and Jason told her, "well honey, in a day or so" and Isabel replied, "NO, mommy come home in 30 minutes, OkAY!!" Ohh too cute!

Saturday afternoon we headed to the Mall of America. Right away Jeannie (Ellen's aunt~who also loves to shop for her grandchildren) announced she was heading to the Disney store. I tagged along and found it very theraputic to shop like crazy for Isabel. It really helped alleviate the guilt. But I soon found out buying her toys only made me feel worse about being away from her. I called Isabel to let her know that I bought her something special....hearing her excitement was a dagger to my heart. I just wanted to get home. So of course I quickly got off the phone and ran upstairs and cried to all the Hammarback woman! Bless their hearts for putting up with me!

Finally I was able to get myself together and we were off to the wedding. Michelle looked beautiful and sooo happpy. I had a blast seeing all my "St.Cloud Peeps"!! And I shared a special bonding moment with AJ, when I started crying at the dance because they played the song "I hope you Dance" (thats my song to Isabel)! Thanks AJ...you're the best! The rest of the night...well lets just say what happens at wedding dances, stays at wedding dances!! HAha! Just kidding, it was great.!

Finally it was Sunday...I could barely think straight waiting to get home. By 4:30pm Teri pulled up to our apt. I practically ran into the building and as I started up the stairs, there came Isabel running and yelling mom! She jumped into my arms and I swear she took my breathe away! I had to hold the tears in. I spent the rest of the night staring at her face because I was and still am convinced that face changed while I was gone!

So while mom was gone...Jason and Isabel had a blast (even though I'm sure they were crying for me the whole weekend~haha)! Jason picked up the movie Madagascar 2...which they watched more than 7 times the whole weekend! They also hit up the arcade,did alittle shopping, and spent some special time with Grandma Joyce!